Corporate Lessons: Anything but Fun

What follows is the lessons I have picked up along the way while working for multinational corporations during the last 10 years. Most of these are a complete opposite of what we are taught during our formative years, but believe me each one of them fits 100%. If I weren’t the “dead brain” I’ve become lately, I’d write down the reason for believing the way I do.

  • Do not take initiatives
  • If you have an active brain, kill it!
  • Walk the line, don’t try jumping to reach the destination faster
  • Don’t react, but respond
  • Write as short an e-mails as possible
  • Screw quality, no one gives a damn about ti anyways
  • Reach office by 9 AM and leave by 7PM
  • Do not try to minimize the iterations
  • Don’t read emails, you just might get encouraged to act on them
  • Never ever take ownership for anything
  • A janitor is a janitor, what if he happens to carry a laptop
  • If you know a better way of doing things, shove it up your backside and dance, but don’t let it out else it will be dispatched to outer space
  • The cafetaria is a nice place to spend the afternoons in
  • Ignore the message and kill the messenger

6 Comments

  • July 16, 2009 - 9:47 am | Permalink

    Hi Manu,

    Thanks for these lessons. They are one stop shop for ideas.

    Prajwal, by “Shifting IPL out of India” we are giving a message to our country that we have lots of important issues to handle then listening to cricketers “Saman Becho (Ad Campaigns)” news.

  • Dr. Shabana Kauser
    May 13, 2009 - 4:35 pm | Permalink

    Very practical and meaningful suggestions.
    People get to know these tips after a long experience or what so called suffering and damage, this blog is a learning tool for all those freshers and all those struggling job holders who are lost somewhere in this corporate world.
    one point I would like to add, An employee should be capable to read his/her employers brain, follow the thought process and enquire his choice and act accordingly.

  • Prajwal Mane
    March 24, 2009 - 5:00 pm | Permalink

    Hi Manu, Fantastic corporate lessons. Must say, stuff like this helps us to reduce our learning curves, and get on the real line of action. I would be greatful to have your views on a hot and buringing topic.. “Shifting IPL out of India, What kind of message are we sending across the globe?”

  • March 4, 2009 - 3:21 pm | Permalink

    🙂 ur the best!

  • March 1, 2009 - 10:09 am | Permalink

    Good Job………..

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